When the first time we meet , i knew we should be friends . You had a different air , than others that i knew . I am also alone in this world , i've come to know . Finally , i've meet someone like you . I know that i might've been a bit a cold at times . But that was just the way i dealt with all my fears . You took the first-step to show . I don't have to be alone , and now i , i know i love you . I'll be waitting for you , dont care how long it may takes . I will always be right here whe you need to laugh or cry . When you are ready to love , and i will rush to your side to sweep you into my arms . Maybe one day you'll know the love that i've kept inside . I know love comes with pain , and its so hard to erase . I known i've found the one when i look into your eyes . I'll wait by your side until you can give me your heart .
p/s : this is what we call "bertepuk sebelah tangan" kan --'
Boy , you no need to give a million of reason why you do this to me because i know this is the best way for you even not for me . And maybe this way can make you satisfied and find another pretty girl , sweet more and more than me . I wont our relationship falling apart like this , but what should i do ? Yeahh you make this way , on your own side . I wont to show my tears on you , so i guess i have to fake-smile and laugh every minutes infront you . Because i want you feel so statisfied and happy .
The brigth white star light shields my tears . In the warm wind , my tears fall . Can you feel it ? Quietly whispering facing you , this quivering feeling . On a white piece of paper , i draw you . Your warm smile embraces me . So perhaps this is love -.- ? Even though i try to close couple of my eyes , i can only see you . I'll be waiting for you , no matter what i wont show my painful tears . You let me know lie-like love . I wont let you go because its simply you . Im walking in the memories of being with you . My heart is brimming with tears , and so what kind should i do ? Even my dream , i miss you ! And now please look at me , like those stars . Cant you be in my heart forever ? But i know this is just what i want , but not you . Im not your types , yes i know :(
24th September '09
He's said he loves me more than i love him . He's said , im his special girlfriend and everything for him . He's said he doesnt want to see me unhappy . He' said , he can do everything for me . He's said , im always make him feel in love with me . He's said he dont want to lose me . He's said bby i love you so much . He's said im gald to found you adeq . He's said he want me . He's said im yours adeq . And he's said im sorry im give up on you :(
Thanks for everything , and im sorry for everything . Do your best way , im just can support you from back . If you happy on this way , yes i have to accept it even i dont want to lose you . And thanks cause make me crying again and again and forever (!)
Do i miss him ?
There's a lot of things I miss everyday it's something new . Today I miss the way my head fit on your shoulder and the comfort of your fingers around my waist . But there's more that I miss when I stop and think and know that I do avoid this when i'm not feeling strong . But right now it's okay but not for long . I miss the color of your eyes even though I can see them when I shut mine . I miss our talks and the fact I never lied . I miss laughing so hard I fell on you . I miss kissing you but I remember it felt like love . I miss being able to miss you when you were away . I miss your texts that were just to say hey . I miss staying up all night and talking about everything . I miss your voice and the way it gave me everything . I miss your hair how soft it felt when I ran my fingers over it . I miss laying my head on your lapand having you trace your fingers on my face . I miss your obsession with fixing my hair and sometimes I still mess it up and wait . I miss our moments and I still want to see your drawings . I miss hearing about your day even though after you left you said it was awful . I miss trying to think of ways to make it better even when you suddenly didn't want me to . I miss you drawing on my hand and pen drawn smiley face on your pants knee . I miss the room where we sat alone and I wonder if our names are still on the table . I miss the comfort of being myself and how I didn't need to dress up to impress you . I miss when you touched your forehead to mine and told me you loved me . I miss that boy . I knew the one who was everything I need I miss him so much but he broke me over and over. He left me , though he can argue . I left him wanted a different life style became something he once hatedand . now he's fine perfectly fine and I'm still broken but I can't regret loving him because he's everything . I need maybe I fell too fast maybe I gave too much maybe I should never have given up but I did because he pushed me away what could I say when he took his world from me . I said I'd always love you , goodbye, good luck . What I meant to say was please don't let this end please come home don't do this . I need you I love you I miss you so much please . But I didn't because I couldn't . And it's over . And I will probably never see that smile again . And I'm sorry, but yes, I'm crying.
sincerly ,
Syahira Nasaruddin
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